Wednesday, 6 January 2010

2012 Olympics

The London 2012 Olympics are being held at a number of venues outside of London in addition to inside the big smoke. All over the country in fact. I am very relieved to hear that Slobbering-under-the-Bed has, after a short battle with neighbouring towns, won the right to host the Apathy events.

Apathy is a small range of events introduced especially for the 2012 games. The Apathy Events are:
  • Synchronised Apathy where a small team can't be bothered to do anything or think about it. Together. In formation. 
  • Triple-Apathy where one athlete can't be fussed about three different things in quick succession. This is also known as the Hop, Skip and Bluuuuh.
  • Ap-Cycle. Sitting dead-still on a bicycle, without putting legs down and falling over sideways.
The mayor of Slobbering, Sir Percy Snodburger, gave an interview to the local paper, when they could be bothered to turn up, praising local Synchronised Apathy team members, Mavis, Joe and Edna. He is reported as saying "We have a world class team here. Edna's recent death has only improved her performance, and we are hoping that Mavis and Joe may pop their clogs before 2012. We're going for gold, silver, perhaps bronze. Well, we'll turn up. Probably."


  1. finally! Olympic events worth watching! i may just have to buy a ticket to see them in person!

  2. Hey 'Difficult. I saw these guys in training; paint drying could only ever hope to claim the Silver medal. Indigo

  3. I'd go watch the games, but I'm really much too tired and I really don't care.

  4. Maybe the anticipation will kill them off? Being so outwardly apathetic can only mean that inside they're a seething ball of tension :)

  5. Since I want to go for gold in the apathy event I'm going to have to not bother turning up. Just replying to this blog may have put my attempt in jeopardy. On this basis I should really delete this entry but I can't raise enough enthusiasm to do so…....

  6. Hello. Loved this. Mavis, Joe and Edna have some serious competition here on the west coast of Canada (quite near Vancouver 2010). The local politicians are saying that apathy is just a cover-up - people are just nervous about acting the host of the party for the rest of the world. Whatever.


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